~ OPERATION: STAY THE CUTEST AND YOUNGEST CHILD FOREVER… okay maybe that’s a long name… OH WELL DAD AND MOM DIDN’T TEACH ME HOW TO MAKE SHORT NAMES YET~
Hi again. Do you remember what happened last time or do you want a recap? FINNNNNEE, guess Grayson will give you all a recap. So here it is.
- Gray is the cutest human being in the entirety of the whole world.
- He’s also the favorite in the DeLoughrey family.
- MOMMY AND DADDY JUST BROKE HIS HEART AND TOLD HIM HE WASN’T GONNA BE THE YOUNGEST BABY ANYMORE WHICH IS NOOOOOT FAIR. EXCUSE THEM. RUDE. HOW DARE THEY.
Let’s just say… this was a catastrophe. It’s like his parents didn’t even love him because if they DID this wouldn’t be happening. BUT NOOOOOO. They just needed another baby, hmph. Well… WE’LL SEE ABOUT THAT. After crying that is - let Grayson get all these emotions out first and then we’ll come up with a plan. Plus crying made it so mommy kissed him and hugged him which was always a plus. So… where the heck do babies come from?
Mommy’s 3 months pregnant:
WHERE DO BABIES COME FROM? No one would tell him. How was he supposed to stop something when he DIDN’T know where babies come from? HUH? This was hard. In one of daddy’s bedtime stories, it said that a stork brought the babies. SO WHERE COULD GRAYSON GET HIS HANDS ON THIS STORK AND STOP IT? HUH? HUUUUUH? Also… what was a stork? Was it a bird? It looked like a bird in the book. That’s exaaccttllly why after daddy read him and Ethan that book, the next day, Grayson tried to throw stuff at every bird he saw.
Mommy took him to the park and bam, throwing his bottle at a bird nearby. Take that baby stork, and don’t come back. Daddy took him and Ethan to play with a soccer ball, and guess whooo pushed the soccer ball in the direction of the bird? THIS GUY. And then daddy called him a little champ, so two birds with one soccer ball right? Woah… that saying finally makes sense. DAD LOOK I KNOW METAPHORS NOW.
On other knews, guess who finalllly said his first word? YES ALSO THIS GUY. Grayson tried to say “Fck” Like Ethan, but look, it just didn’t work out. We’ll try that word again later, but he did get out “Babababbababba” which sloooowllyyy with practice turned into “bah-bee” and then to “Bay-beeee” and mommy and daddy seemed proud at him for that one. They kept saying yes that’s what you are but Grayson was trying to tell them NO MORE BABIES AND HE WAS THE LAST ONE. But hey, one word at a time right?
Mommy’s 4 months pregnant
Dear audience, we have a problem. So do you want the good news or bad news? Which one do you want to hear first? Oh, I guess we’ll start with the good news. It seems like the right place to start. Grayson successfully let ALL the storks know who’s boss. He also learned the word “No” and proceeded to tell EVERY stork that so they for sure knew that they couldn’t come here with a new baby. It wasn’t allowed. So the good news is, if the storks listen, there will BE NO MORE BABIES. Now you wanna know the bad news? Well, simply, WHERE THE BLOODY HELL WAS MOM?
Grayson didn’t know. One day mommy was here, and the next he got a kiss on his cheeks with mommy telling him she’d be back soon. WELL ITS BEEN WEEKS MOM, WHERE ARE YOU? Daddy was giving him this DISGUSTING milk. It was the same kind Lexie drank, and let Grayson tell everyone, IT WAS NOT THE SAME AS THE GOOD STUFF. Lexie honestly was crazyyyyyyyy for liking this stuff… like no wonder she was a lil weird. Seriously. What was wrong with that girl. This was not Grayson’s opinion of a good time. Ethan didn’t like it either… let’s be honest, it just wasn’t the same . Mommy called on this weird portal thingy that Dad kept in his pocket, but everytime Grayson put his mouth on the portal thing to get some milk dad either told him no and it didn’t taste like the good stuff. It was weird, and he couldn’t get to him mom through it. WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THE PORTAL DAD? But everyyyyy day his mom told him, hey and talked to him which was fun… until Shay or Zoe or Aidan took the phone which was rude, but anyways every day Grayson told her “Baaah babda babbaa baby no” trying to tell her 1. no babies, and 2. to come back home. Did it work? NOooooo she kept saying something about Cousin Dan needing her but let’s be honest WHO CARED ABOUT COUSIN DAN? WHat Grayson cared about was that he wanted goooood food and while mom was gone, he not only didn’t get milk but dad would never sneak him ice cream or yummy stuff like that. This was terrible. Mom… come… back home please
The worst of it was that because dad was alone, Gray BARELY got any attention. It was either Zoe this, or Shay that, or even paying attention to Ethan - that attention hog. Guess what Ethan, you’re not the only one who can say a word now so GET GONE. Okay fine, Ethan wasn’t horrible. When dad wasn’t giving Gray attention, at least he could talk to Ethan. They had many intellectually stimulating conversations on what different items felt like in their mouth. One day, Ethan would tell him about how licking the floor was and Gray would subsequently tell him about the taste of his own toe. See. Intellectually stimulating. Duh.
Mommy’s 6 months pregnant
GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS AGAIN. We have a lot of these huh? Good news is that daddy started feeding them real food, FINALLY. I mean besides the weird stuff like peas and carrots that Gray spit out, there was also good stuff like apple sauce and smooshy peaches and pears. YUM. Gray still preferred milk, but mommy was back so he got it ofteeenn. Mommy was getting really big though, clearly, she ate good food when she was away. If only Grayson could have shared with her . Oh well, that didn’t matter. Gray was happy. He got good food, he got his mommy’s attention and daddy’s attention.
But you wanna know the bad news, there was something in his mouth and it hurt A LOT. Biting stuff helped it hurt less, but it hurt SOOOOOOO much every day. Ethan was experiencing the same thing and when Grayson looked into Ethan’s mouth, there was this white monster in there. So OF COURSE Grayson cried all night. He kept telling his parents about the monster, but they woudln’t listen and just tried to make him go back to sleep but it was hard to sleep with a MONSTER IN YOUR MOUTH.
GET WITH THE PROGRAM MOM AND DAD AND GET IT OUT. Daddy said the monster’s name was first tooth and it was a meannnn monster. Hopefully they could get rid of it soon.
Mommy’s 8 months pregnant
Okay so… Gray knew how to admit when he was wrong. That First tooth monster wasn’t a monster, it was something that helped him eat food. After the pain stopped, it was actually kinda helpful. But still, if next time we could do without the pain, that would be greatttttt. There was another thing Gray was wrong about, and this one, ooooohhhh, this one. IT was bigger. It was worse. REmember when Grayson got rid of the new baby? WELL. WELLLLL APPARENTLY THERE WASN’T A STORK. THE BABY IS IN MOMMY’S BELLY. How it got in there? WHO KNOWS. This was terrible. All the work Grayson did, and now the baby is STILL coming? Oh no.
SOOOOO whenever mommy held him, Grayson made sure to press her stomach and yell “NO” to make sure the babies knew who the boss was. Do you know who the boss is? ITS GRAYSON. So listen. It was totally working, trust him. Everytime mommy held him he made sure to do a push and tell them who it needed to listen to and that was Grayson.
It was okay. There would be no more babies. Watch. WATCH. hmph. Grayson had a plan, and it was called being authoritative.
Well… that didn’t work
MAY DAY WE HAVE A PROBLEM. Tears fell down Graysons eyes as he cried to the nanny. Daddy and mommy had been gone for two days and the nanny just told him he had two new siblings. Oh no. Why were Shay and Zoe and Aidan so excited? At least Ethan cried with him. This was terrible. He wasn’t the youngest anymore. “Mo…moommmy” Grayson cried in the little prison his parents called a play pen.
Apparently, his mommy and daddy were coming home today. What was he supposed to do? Well, Grayson would just have to find a way to get rid of them. Then… well… he heard them. The door opened and he heard the familiar voices of his parents. Crying louder, Gray wanted to get his parents attention. Forget the new kids, LOOK AT HIM. But nooo. The moment his mom came in, every one of his siblings surrounded his mom and dad and he couldn’t even see them through the bars of his playpen.
It toooook a lonnnng time but after a while, mommy and daddy finally made their way to him and Ethan, walking inside with blankets in their arms. Why did they have blankets? Was it a gift for him? It better be a gift for him. But when his dad sat down, he clearly saw it WASN’T a gift for him. No, instead, hidden beneath the sheets that dad was holding was something weird. It was sooo weird that Grayson stopped crying to get a closer look and then mom sat down and she had another blanket with something weird in it.
It was only when he got a closer look that he realized what they were holding . It was them. The babies. THE BABIES THAT WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO EXIST. Grayson pouted, looking at the one dad was holding. But then she opened her eyes, mumbling something incomprehensible… clearly… she hadn’t learned advanced baby yet. But omg, she was actually kind of… hmm no… Grayson stay strong.
“bbbmmhm”
His little sister muttered, opening her eyes and turning towards him with a look. “baadam me moomy” Clearly he was telling the kid that the people holding him was his parents, but she didn’t look phased as she put her lil hand out and tentatively, Grayson moved his hand to hers and then his heart melted. After a second of confusion, the little girl put his hand in hers and then Grayson found himself sighing, knowing that he could only protect her after that. Well, her and the other kid in mommy’s hands. “badad mpp love jeeee bah ddmmm”
So of course he told those two that Fine he’d love them and protect them but he was still obviously cuter than them. I mean. Obviously.