How do you choose your friends?

I have no idea how exactly I choose mine but I seem to choose the right people most of the time somehow :eyes::sparkles::green_heart::no_mouth:

So, how do you choose your friends?
Are there any specific things people have to fulfill to be chosen as your friend?
Do you think that you’re good at choosing your friends? :eyes::sparkles:


Usually people become my friends when I simply have a good time talking to them, haha, it’s a feeling it’s nothing you can really put in words in my opinion…


I’ve never chosen my friends because I’m super shy around new people. So I befriend anyone who approaches me and that technique has worked surprisingly well. I have some greaaat friends. We don’t see each other that often but we never seem to lose contact.

I just talked to a friend today after not hearing from each other since the beginning of the quarantine and we were talking like we always do. I expect her to sent me some art next week that she has been working on for over a year lol because she refuses to let me see them now. :sob:


I like my friends mature, but fun at the same time. Also people with whom I can be very honest, and who are honest with me. I don’t mean the “im-sharing-all-my-secrets-with-you” type of honesty but like a daily honesty, when we don’t surgarcoat crap.

I think I’m good at choosing friends, now at least. The one thing I learned is that you should trust your gut. Even if I don’t have anything against the person at the moment and they seem friendly, but if I feel some kind of …I dunno. Like I can’t trust them. I won’t.


Let’s just say that I treat this like some job interview. I try getting to know the person and see if they’re mature enough to be friends with me like see if they are able to accept the conditions I give them such as “Do not talk about politics 24/7” or bring up certain topics that may be very sensitive to me. It annoys me when people base their friendships over political opinions. Can’t we all just get along?


Hmm… For me I either immediately click with people, or I don’t. I mean I have developed friendships with people, but most of the time I just know when I meet them :woman_shrugging: We kind of just understand each other and talking to each other is easy, and isn’t forced or anything


Not really. But I don’t spend that much time talking to others or trying to make friends. So I usually end up friends with the people that won’t leave me alone. I eventually grow to love them as a sibling.


I don’t choose them I just get stuck with them somehow but I love it


I don’t. I just talk with people and if we click then we click. Friendship for me goes two ways, 'cause you both have to put in the effort into keeping in touch and wanting to talk to the other. It doesn’t matter if you don’t speak every day, just that it’s not only one person doing all the work. (wink)


There’s a lengthy application process. You don’t know you’re taking it, but it’s there!


People tell me a lot I’m a pretty extroverted indivual. So I usually find myself talking and cracking jokes with a lot of people.

But for me, I’d say I have a few close friends rather than a bunch of friends. To me, friends are people you need to be able to trust. They’re people you can easily talk to about anything, not fake or manipulative or controlling or mentally abusive. In any relationship really, no one should ever be controlling the other. They’re also good with not having to speak every day and suddenly question, “oh man goodness…she ain’t my friend no more…shes backstabbing me…” so back to that trust thing XD but defintely work on both sides, and talking just comes naturally. They’re ok with your weirdness, your quirks, and your flaws. And they’re there for you :woman_shrugging:


I usually wait for them to approach me but when I’m on my drugs I muster every ounce of courage the divine being above has bestowed on me and I approach them. If I start having a conversation in my head then I know we ain’t gonna last but if I am truly invested I’ll talk and if it’s easy to communicate with the person without having to constantly check myself and surroundings then I know we are going to be friends.


I feel like half of the time I don’t pick my friends, my friends claim me. At least that’s how it was with one friend I made in high school. We’re very opposite. She is more extroverted and not calm or focused at all. We talked some and she kinda claimed me. People who are not calm and focused like I am seem to be drawn towards me for some reason…

Mainly though, I don’t really look to make friends. Some I’ve made because they lived across the street from me so we would play together, then a couple of guys, that are kinda like siblings for me, I know because our moms know each other. Otherwise it takes me a while to be comfortable around someone. It takes quite a while of just talking and finding common interests for me to start thinking of them as a friend. (But I also count people as acquaintances at a point when most would say friends)

my taste in friends has definitely been iffy over the years lol ik that

now i just look for loyal and accountable ppl who i vibe with

well said

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Okay, so either I approach her/him or he/she approaches me but if we have a good connection towards each other and we understand each other’s problems. We have to act like our normal selves and not trying to impress each other by acting like someone else. If they are a true friend and not someone who goes behind your back to gossip. If they avoid conversations were people talk about me and if they are someone that cares about me and can risk anything to protect me and keep me happy. I look at their personality basically when choosing friends. If we help each other through struggles, when we need a shoulder to cry on, someone to laugh with or when we are angry at someone. Of course, when it comes to friendship, there are different responsibilities we have, we always know that there will be an argument one way or the other but it shouldn’t escalate to cause a problem. You need a friend who you can share your secrets with and make sure it is secured. You need a friend who wouldn’t judge you for anything you do. Overall, you need a friend who will be with you through every step you go through. :wink:

I want to say more but this is enough! :sweat_smile:



I’m very picky with it comes to friends, that’s why I don’t have friends in the first place lol.

I don’t think there are specific things as a trait, as long as you’re nice to me, theb you’re fine.

And no, I’m horrible at choosing friends.


We aren’t friends? :pleading_face::broken_heart::eyes::sparkles:


This is quite an interesting one because I’ve spent time with no friends so I got to a stage where anyone would become my friend if they just let me sit with them :sweat_smile: that resulted in me landing in a few toxic friendships which I got out of too late.

But now after learning, I do have some specifications:

  1. I don’t care about being texted back right away or being left on read. It’s the way I feel after they do it. If I feel “oh yeah fair enough they probably don’t have the energy to text back right now” and I genuinely feel that way, then they go up in the friendship book. If I feel stressed and paranoid then I need to think of why they are making me feel that way.

  2. Ideally we should have at least some common interests, I don’t demand everybody likes the same things as me. More just that they aren’t rude to me if I do have different interests.

  3. They don’t f*ck with my head. Being social is hard enough for me anyway since it’s tiring, I’m overthinking, I don’t actually know what’s going on half the time.

  4. They respect my personal boundries, I had this problem with a small group of friends and despite the amount of times I said “I don’t like being touched and I’m not great with loud noises” they proceeded to poke me, screech and hug me :slightly_smiling_face:

  5. They make me feel included, they ask me for my opinions or they invite me to stuff instead of just assuming I’ll say no. They listen to me when I’m talking just like I listen to them.

  6. They don’t make comments on my eating or food choices while I’m eating or put any pressure on me or stress while I am eating. I know I look weird eating in public, that’s because I hate it :slightly_smiling_face: I have to eat slowly so I can keep it down.

  7. They don’t attempt to “one up” me all the time

If they fit this, they are probably gonna be people I hold close.